March 3rd, 2008

There Are This Many Kabbalistic Paths of Wisdom

Posted by natdavauer in Uncategorized

What will make tonight a little different for my wife will be the fact that she will go to sleep with a younger man and wake up with him having left her. In his place will have appeared an old man. Well, not old really, just old-er. Same age as her in fact so maybe she won’t feel weird at all. The old man will feel old though.

How old is old you ask? How many teeth does the average person have in their mouth I respond? Too difficult for you? Well how about this: It’s the smallest number n with exactly 7 solutions to the equation φ(x) = n. It is also the sum of the totient function for the first ten integers.

I thought this was a no-big-deal age to turn, but thanks to The Internet, it’s feeling much more significant. It all depends on how you look at it I guess. It’s pretty epic to turn this age in binary. The ripe old age of 1000000… sounds pretty old though, I prefer to think of it in hexadecimal, a refreshing, wide-eyed 20.

You gotta take the good with the bad. That’s what getting older is all about.

Good: The number of completed piano sonatas written by Beethoven. Bad: the country code to direct-dial Belgium.

Good: The bit size of a databus commonly used in computers. Bad: Jesus’ age when he was crucified.

Good: The year of this century when John Spartan (the Demolition Man) will be removed from cryo-stasis to help deal with Simon Phoenix. Bad: The very same year will be the assassination of John Connor by a T-850 series Terminator. (One possible future.)

As I go to bed a young man, the age of which there are Baskin Robins flavors, the only thing I hope for is that tomorrow there will be less ice to chip off the driveway. Ironically, I will wake up the age of which water freezes in degrees Fahrenheit.

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