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January 27th, 2011

Young at Heart or Just Old Fart

Posted by natdavauer in Uncategorized

Am I old? I don’t know. I feel old. I remember feeling young and I’m not quite sure when that changed. What it means to feel young, as in “I feel open minded and hopeful” is very different from “I feel young. My knees and back have no pain at all.”

This sentiment is painfully obvious as I stand surrounded by heaving, focused youth. They surround me gulping air and turning it into power. They aren’t trying to focus their energy, or even do something to “stay in shape.” They are just being young.

I grimace when I roll my leg on a foam tube at home in the living room. My goal is to be able to simply move my limbs as nature intended, not execute quick, accurate movements that will win me medals, but simple moments that if maintained will keep me out of a wheelchair someday.

These are high school swimmers. They aren’t olympians, they aren’t even a good team, they are just a good example of youth. Able to focus their mind on the goal of moving their body through the water as quickly as possible. Their bodies able to focus on that task with little preparation and virtually no caution. They throw their bodies into the water and tear and grab themselves to the other side and back. They get out and their bodies recover sucking in air and breaking up lactic acid.

The breathing is all I can hear as I try to remember to at least stand up straight.

One Response to ' Young at Heart or Just Old Fart '

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  1. akja said,
    on August 21st, 2011 at 1:43 pm

    at what point does one think they are old? to know they are old? age. maybe. a number. a feeling. a word or two of your ‘appearance’ or perhaps that feeling, as you say, of your legs hurting or perhaps of noticing they don’t hurt. . . today.

    but old fart? i refuse. old fart in my perception, is a just that, a related word to how a label is placed on one’s own image. i am not an ‘old fart’. I may be ‘old fashioned’ and ‘not hip’ but to be honest, i don’t think teenagers are the pinnacle of life.

    Youth is awesome. vibrant life. Though I can say for me, i am happier now then i ever was then. i feel more alive then i did then. i could physically move better then. I can think better now. i feel better now.

    so perhaps in a world of perceptions, mine is one where life is a a wonderfully strange bird with wings perceived.

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